Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Tip: make sure your thesis is clear

Your thesis statement is this:

However, I completely disagree with this opinion.

The thesis is unclear because the reader doesn’t know what this opinion refers to. It could be either of the following:

this opinion = military service should be compulsory

this opinion = military service contributes to developing maturity and building patriotism in youth

It is important to make your position very clear in the thesis statement. Here’s a possible rewrite:

However, I disagree with the idea that military service be compulsory.

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